FRIDAY: COMPASSION FOR YOURSELF

“If you have no compassion for yourself, then you are not capable of developing compassion for others.”

The Dalai Lama

Reflect all day today on “What compassion do I give myself?”

Many people judge themselves harshly. Do you allow God’s grace to flow through and to you for the mistakes you make? Do you beat yourself up as a failure?

Mistakes bring learning. If you’ve never made a mistake, you’ve missed a lot of learning opportunities. Some of our biggest and most beneficial lessons (which did not seem so beneficial at the time) come from our biggest “mistakes.”

Imagine what a toddler learning to walk would do if every time he or she fell down, we shouted at them, told them what silly idiots they were, and used the kind of phrases we use on ourselves all the time? Pretty soon, they would cry and not attempt to walk anymore.

We limit ourselves in the same way when we give ourselves no graciousness, mercy or compassion.

Are you hard on yourself—do you drive yourself mercilessly? Do you think you are “ridiculous,” or do you talk to yourself in the tone of voice that says, “I am an idiot!”?

Do you deny any feelings you have and just swallow what happens to you and never allow yourself to feel pain? Do you load yourself with guilt or accept others dumping all the blame on you and not accepting any themselves? If so, stop it today!

We are all humans, doing the best we can, and we need to give ourselves a lot of grace and compassion.

Today, your task is to be endlessly tender and loving with yourself. Be gracious to yourself for things you have done in the past and move on; allow yourself to feel some of the pain that may have been suppressed for a long time. It really is okay to feel the pain—as long as it comes out and you deal with yourself compassionately. (Best you do that with someone you trust and when you have time to cry!) Give yourself permission to feel whatever your heart needs to; recognize and release stuff that is held inside and blocking your progress.

Set the intention before you climb out of bed: “Today I will be compassionate (loving, tender and grace-giving) with myself. I will pay attention to my “true” self, the one that lives in my heart, and not the selfish, spoiled personality (which is the “front” you put on for the world to supposedly keep you safe!)”

Your heart will rule whatever you say to yourself and how you treat yourself today. That judgmental, nasty, critical, nagging voice will be silent—all day and hopefully for a lot longer! You have been doing the best you can with what you’ve had, so pat yourself on the back and give yourself a TA-DA!

You will be gentle and kind to yourself as you learn how to walk again – this time on the path of compassion.