WEDNESDAY—FIND THE FEARS; MOVE TO HOPE

“Don’t lose hope. When it gets darkest, the stars come out. ”

Anonymous

In “Freeing the Soul from Fear,” my wonderful mentor and teacher Robert Sardello suggests fear is always present in our world. Learning to work with hope in our hearts can help balance that fear, and move us towards a hopeful heart.

Today is the day to find places in your life where fear makes you behave in ways you don’t like, respect or admire. Being unconscious of fear allows it to grow, fester and prove itself right. The fear says, “See—I told you to be frightened. See what happened because you didn’t follow my advice?”

Not all fear is bad, of course. Fear or feeling the need for caution can be a warning sign of truly dangerous situations and can help you make safe decisions. I don’t step out in front of moving cars or walk down dark streets in dangerous areas or do things that I have a strong knowing not to do!

But many of our fears are imagined—beliefs that have sprung wrongly from our imaginations. (Remember my fear of the dark and bogeymen as a little girl?) Today, review your fears and decide whether your fear is warning you of something real, or if it’s imagined and falsely ruling your life. Where you recognize fear is driving your behavior, stop and see if it is the best motivator for you. Are you really in danger? And if not, reframe the situation from a hope-filled perspective.

I find sometimes I am frightened to say something to my husband, colleagues or friends—afraid they may react with anger or defensiveness or be upset. But in reality, nothing bad will happen if I say what I need to say, kindly, honestly, and from my heart.

They may react angrily, but is that really a reason for the paralyzing fear in me? In fact, it may lead us to a resolution. If I don’t address what is bothering me, that fear creates a barrier between us, and I behave in a resentful or angry manner and the results are usually far worse than if I chose to operate with hope, tried to speak from my heart, and addressed what was bothering me.

Resentment can build up and up, and it influences how I interact with those around me negatively in every way. I might think my resentment goes away, but it doesn’t! Hope gives me the courage to say what I need to say.

For example, if I read an email and am concerned that there was an undercurrent of irritation in it, I can sit and fret and worry about it until it is a real issue for me. I become fearful that I have unknowingly done something wrong. Instead of this, I could call the person and from my heart, say, “I read your email and I was wondering if I have done anything to upset you?” Said in a soft, concerned voice from my heart, this usually has a positive response, and brings about resolution—if there was anything to resolve! The critical part is to be honest with yourself and speak from your heart.

Pick one situation you are dealing with at the moment, and see if you can detect any fear surrounding it. If you do, find or breathe in hope, and see what inspiration comes with hope in your heart.

How many times have you been afraid to say something or do something until finally, when you blurted it out as a fear-driven utterance, you found yourself in all sorts of strife! When you finally find the courage to face the same sort of situation with hope in your heart, dealing with it is easier!

Most of our challenges and difficulties are in our imaginations! They are rarely real. Turn the light on (by that, I mean put hope into your heart) and see how the bogeymen have all gone away. A heart that is thinking correctly fears nothing.